Why are you mad?

Anger. One of the very few emotions that can define so many aspects of our lives. One of the only emotions that can drive us away from each other in just a few seconds, from the impulsivity of our emotions. Instant regret. So why is it that anger makes us hurt the ones we care about the most? 

Humans interpret situations in a variety of manners, many of which can trigger angry reactions.  

Ranging from mild to explosive, they often are likely to create cumulative damage over time. Anger often serves to make people feel more powerful when they can’t express their more vulnerable underlying emotions. We are preceded by feelings of frustration, hurt, unmet needs, or perceived injustice.  

However it wouldn’t be right to generalize the reasons for which anger occurs. Each individual has their own ‘triggers’. You’re walking to class, the person in front of you wont pick up their pace and you find yourself getting a little frustrated. You might sigh loudly, roll your eyes, or keep your emotions completely hidden. Every reaction is personal and unique to each individual. There is no way to predict the way someone will react. How extreme a person’s reaction and response to anger justifies its capability to destroy relationships in a matter of seconds. 

It seems ironic that the ones we tend to release most anger towards are those we care about most, though this is exactly what usually happens. It is possible to say that love doesn’t exist, complacency does. When we love someone we discover an appreciation for everything it is believing that abusing will not damage it. However it is often that overestimate love, expecting more than it can provide. The connection created through love can only resist so many obstacles. Therefore when we overestimate and abuse its complacency in anger, we hurt those we care for the most. 

Have you ever felt the need to stay angry at someone just for the sake of protecting your integrity? It may seem like a necessary measure to take at the time but anger can turn into a habit, making us think less rationally. If this reaction becomes a habit, you might quickly find yourself losing people unintentionally. it is often too late to regain the ones we lost in the process.

Whether seen in a relationship, or just towards a friend or family member, anger is almost inevitable. The way in which a person reacts can certainly be abrupt, but ultimately it is derived from love and care for them. To control our reactions in order to preserve the bond we couldn’t bare losing demonstrates true appreciation for those we love.